SecondIron's Blog

Sharpening Iron to Live Second

Two Sides to Every Marriage

Just like a coin, there are two sides to every marriage. Do you find yourself at times at odds with your spouse? Worried that no matter what you say or do it won’t be right. This is not to say that there is anything wrong per se. Women and men are built differently, we all know that. Whether they are from Mars and eat Waffles or from Venus full of Spaghetti. No matter what the interpretation the result it we are different, and thank God we are. Being different can cause divides in understanding that can make it feel like we don’t know one another. This has nothing to do with how much we love and adore each other. Everyone knows that you love one another, but is that enough? You pass by each other throughout your days together like two ships in a harbor. You know each other are there and may wave in passing without really checking into port. If we don’t make the effort to check-in and communicate with each other we will become strangers In the night. Keeping this in mind, the way we check-in is going to be different, what works for one will not work for the other. Let me break it down a little bit for you. Ladies- When we say we are thinking nothing ..we mean we really are thinking “nothing”. Feelings are different for us, they are not colored with rainbows led by unicorns and many times they come in one syllable words. We do not know how to fix things […]

21 Ways to Fill Your Wife’s Bank (Not what you think)

Ways to Fill Your Wife’s Bank (Not what you think) As a man, scratch that as a married man there are certain challenges every married man faces. We put on fronts and behave like  young adolescents at times in order to maintain appearances.  Appearances that we believe only we can see our true identity. We put up fronts for our friends and coworkers, we cannot help but have those fronts bleed into our marriages. You see guys whether you like it or not, your wife knows more about the real you than you do.  We spend so much time faking it that we lose ourselves in the process. When this happens you will know, trust me men, you will know. When your wife begins to feel neglected, she will let it go and begin to fester. You go through your days thinking everything is okay until one day you are blindsided by untold anger. You see while you are busy keeping up with the Joneses and making sure everyone else is happy.  The one we always seem to leave behind is the one that should matter most. We tend to fill up our free time with things to do, whether it is going to the movies, parties, fundraisers and the like.  Just because we are busy does not really mean we are spending time. Men look at it as if as long as we are keeping a social calendar and taking our wives out we are spending quality time. The issue is the quality time to us […]

Nine Ways to Not Suck as a Husband

Nine years ago today my life was changed forever in ways I never imagined. In order to put things into perspective, nine years ago today I was still a mess of a man. That day I married my best friend who in turn has attempted to clean the mess she married. Over the past nine years I have spent repairing the damage of the years prior to becoming a husband. My wife unknowingly has taught me lessons on being a man, better yet being a better man and husband that I thought I would share. A good husband is never the first to go to sleep at night or the last to awake in the morning. -Honore de Balzac Click To Tweet You see women in general believe when they marry a man they will be able to fix all that’s broken. Sometimes this is true, sometimes it will be a long journey similar to that of the Trail of Tears. “God created marriage. No government subcommittee envisioned it. No social organization developed it. Marriage was conceived and born in the mind of God.”  ~ Max Lucado  Men meanwhile think that if they get married they can continue to be a kid just with bigger and better toys. This is probably what I thought nine years ago. Little did I know I needed fixing, better yet that I wanted to be fixed. 9 ways to Not Suck as a Husband Be Emotionally available – yes guys this means share your feelings and communicate with your spouse. You will be surprised how […]